Have you ever been in love? A lot of us are terrified to be in love and will deny its truth, even if all the signs are there. Disney got it right with “I Won’t Say I’m In Love” from “Hercules.”
Even if you haven’t yet said the ever-dreaded L-word to your person, even if you’re not officially “together” and even if you have absolutely no intention to be in love, you very well might be.
Love can present itself in mysterious, ridiculous ways. There are things you might be doing or things that might be happening that make you think, “Hm, weird.” Guess what? These things could mean love:
1. He/she frustrates the living hell out of you, and yet you still tolerate him/her
This person may have not yet realized you’re always right (duh), and every time he or she does something stupid, you just want to shake his or her big, dumb head.
Half of the time, this person makes you want to scream, and you communicate this with passion in your voice. This person is a gigantic pain in your ass, but in the end, he or she is your pain in the ass.
No matter how frustrating this person gets, you never stop wanting to be with him or her. You’re beginning to realize the opposite of love isn’t hate, but rather, it’s indifference.
Hate and love are very similar. When you say, “Ugh, I hate you so much,” it’s not what you mean at all.
2. It doesn’t matter what you’re saying
You could be talking about absurd names for a dog, and you will still always remember that conversation because the two of you somehow made it riveting and worthwhile.
This person says a word that’s not even a real word, and suddenly, it’s your new favorite, simply because he or she said it. There’s no such thing as small talk with the two of you. Even talking about the weather means something.
There isn’t a thought in your head this person hasn’t already heard. What you’re actually saying doesn’t matter at all; you’re just saying words because you’re together, enjoying each other’s company.
If the two of you are talking, it’s always amazing, no matter what it’s about. Even if it’s a 3 am phone conversation and you’re both half-asleep, it’s still the best thing ever.
3. You’ll make your life harder for him/her
It’s not always easy to be with someone. Sometimes, there’s distance involved or you’re both too busy to breathe, or the entire universe seems to be conspiring to keep you apart.
Sometimes, it takes planning, scheduling, rescheduling and a whole lot of finagling to make seeing this person work; yet, you’re always willing to do it. Even if it means your life will be 10 times more difficult for that day, week or month, it’s worth it just to see him or her.
You’d call out of work, take a cab, get a hotel, hop a train, rendezvous in a Denny’s parking lot, go to the airport at 4 am just for an hour to see him or her off before a flight, or go to any other crazy length just to see each other.
It all seems insane, and yet, you’ve never questioned it. You would move hell and Earth to get to this person.
4. You’re willing to run errands with him/her
Most of the time, you don’t even want to run errands alone. The mundane parts of our lives, like grocery shopping, picking out new glasses and grabbing Advil from CVS, are things we groan and mutter about doing.
For some reason, though, when this person asks you to come along on an adventure to find quarters to do laundry or to pick out a new stick of deodorant, you don’t say no.
What’s more is that, sometimes, it’s even the best part of your day (okay, maybe on one of your less exciting days). No matter what, these stupid errands are always easier with this person.
5. You can talk about your bodily functions around him/her
Some of us might be super shy about mentioning poop or farts around people who aren’t directly related to us. Girls aren’t supposed to do those things, since we’re all roses and rainbows.
Around your person, though, all bets are off. You fart next to him or her just to provoke a hysterical reaction. He or she yells at you not to come into the bathroom until the smell has subsided, and you call him or her ridiculous.
You use the bathroom even while your person is in the shower. Bodily functions seem embarrassing everywhere else, but when you’re with this person, it’s a hysterical conversation piece. Basically, the two of you are weird as hell, and it’s perfect.
6. Even just two minutes is worth it
Your person calls you up one night and tells you he or she can’t talk but wanted to say hi. Those 30 seconds make you happier than anything else has all day.
For you guys, it’s not about the countless continuous hours spent together; every simple minute is worth everything.
7. He/She makes you want to yell a lot
For some reason, it’s hard to be quiet around this person. Even your laughs get louder when you two are together. When you two have a disagreement, you yell because it feels so important, and you need to get your point across.
Something about yelling always feels more intense, and it mirrors the feelings you have for the person. So, you yell a lot — sometimes out of anger, but more often out of joy.
8. The time you waste with him/her doesn’t feel wasted
There are days when the two of you don’t even get out of bed. You’ve had sex three times in one morning just because neither of you feels like doing anything else.
When people ask you what you did during the day you wasted with this person, you say “nothing,” but feel like it was the most productive day of your whole life. Now, that’s something.
9. You have a lot of questions for him/her
Well, you have a lot of questions in general: How do taxes work? How long would it take to drive across the United States? Where do I go to mail this letter? What inspires you? What should I eat for dinner? What does Nigerian food taste like?
Whenever you have a question or musing about life, you direct it to this person, who likely doesn’t know the answer. Still, you’d always rather ask this person than someone you know will know the answer.
It might frustrate him or her, but it also starts great conversations, and secretly, he or she doesn’t mind at all.
10. Everything makes you think of him/her
Everything that happens in your life somehow becomes about this person. A rainstorm will make you think, “Oh man, [insert name] needs to know about this,” even if you know he or she can see the same rain.
You feel the need to share every arbitrary experience with this person. Every song that plays is about him or her, and if it’s not, you think, “I’m so glad [insert name] is not like this song. S/he is so much better.”
The weird pimple on your pinky toe? The penne noodle that got into your spaghetti noodles at Olive Garden? Your entire life becomes one gigantic reminder that your person is alive.
11. He/She scares the sh*t out of you
Love is terrifying, and even if you pretend you don’t know yet that you love him or her, you can feel it’s where this is heading. Even if you’re just starting to get close to someone, we all know closeness can lead to getting hurt.
When you look at this person, you know he or she could hurt you more than anyone you’ve ever met before in your life. You have the urge to push him or her away because being with this person makes you feel vulnerable, and it’s terrifying.
You freak out when he or she gets emotional and displays feelings because, then, there’s no hiding it anymore. This person scares you, and it’s the most fun you’ve ever had being afraid.
If you think about it, if that fear suddenly went away, you’d miss it dearly.
This person’s love scares you, but deep inside, you know you want it.